Heavy on my Head
I open my mouth
and take you in
Physically ready
But my brain is absent.
–I’ve switched off–
The wood of the dock is rough,
the water’s smooth.
The sky is blue and it smells like summer.
Your hands, heavy on my head.
bring me home.
–I’d like to stop–
My lips are numb
my eyes are wet,
though I’m not crying.
I caress my own arm
and pretend
you’re not watching porn.
That you say,
come up here baby.
Let me see you.
I had a guy say that to me before.
Once.
And it meant the world.